source: the fug chics

Can somebody tell me where the hell Angelina’s maternity boobies have gone? The battle of the Celebrity Moms of Multiples Angelina Jolie (aka Brad’s Lady Person) & Jennifer Lopez (aka “J.Lo”)

ANGELINA: Hey girlfriend? nice to see you.

J.LO: mhm… Oh, Brad’s Lady Person, me duele. This pains me, because I would like to say the same, but I cannot.

ANGELINA: Excuse me?

J.LO: It is clear nobody taught you how to have twins.

ANGELINA: I… What?

J.LO: Look at you in that black thing. I cannot see even your boobs. What is the point of getting fat for nine months if you can’t make people stand in awe of your hotness when you are fit again? Have you learned nothing from my girl Halle Berry, Madonna, and well of course me?

ANGELINA: Kids are great and I plan to collect them all but gotta stay fit for Brad. Working on the ring you know?

J.LO: Ah, yes, I love my little tiny twin tots and the dwarf hubby is cool too. But I also love my big ole tah tahs, boobies, breast — the ones on my chest. I HYPNOTIZE with them. Try to look away.

ANGELINA: So expose my tah tahs you say?

J.LO: Ah, yes!! This is what you must achieve, Angennifer. You must take a lesson from me, Pitt twig! Lay it all out there! Your boobs are like God’s tattoos. They have MEANING. MAKE PEOPLE LOOK. Can it with the sad strapless sheaths. Mis ojos, they burn with shame for your lack of FLASH.

ANGELINA: THANKS for the advice girl. Graciass or whatever you hot latinas say!

And so, this concludes this years mommy multiple celebrity drams.  And based on this hush hush interaction between to the hot cocktail mom celebs, I’ve taken the liberty to sport a few of Angelina’s pics. I think she actually listened to my girl J.LO and Angelina Jolie ditched all that sad black and grey-A-holic addiction for some color. The proof is in the pudding:

Leave me a comment, subscribe and keep me posted ladies. Im loving the feedback! Cheers 2 Motherhood!

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